


As You Wish

by Eric Cartman (Monobear)



Category: South Park
Genre: Fluff, M/M, One Shot, Romance, Sleepovers, Yaoi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-01-25
Updated: 2014-01-25
Packaged: 2018-01-09 22:44:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 931
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1151691
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Monobear/pseuds/Eric%20Cartman
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Fairy tales nowadays have a lot lower standards, don't they?</p>
            </blockquote>





	As You Wish

He didn't know how it happened, but there they were. All four of the boys were crowded around Stan's TV screen, watching whatever TV that they happened to land on. Kenny, at the moment, was in control of the remote, and he was dryly commenting on every channel that flipped by. "Boring. Boring. Lifetime. Boring. History Channel." He shot a glance at Cartman that meant 'no, we're not watching any shows about World War 2 tonight.' Cartman pouted in return. "Oh, we're nearing the movie channels. We might actually find something interesting here. It may, ladies and gents, be a Christmas miracle, and it's fucking January." Kenny snickered, continuing to flip channels. 

"No. Wait. Go one back." Cartman demanded, crossing his arms. Kenny raised a brow, but he obeyed, and looked baffled at the choice.

"This one?"

"Yeah."

Stan opened one eye, looking at the screen. "Oh. Hey. Princess Bride. Pretty decent. Who picked it?"

"Down here." Cartman nodded, but stared intently at the screen, looking pretty interested. It was pretty surprising, but considering it wasn't WW2 propaganda or a horror movie that he said that he was purely into for 'intellectual purposes. Of course. No ulterior motives.' 

With a sheer glance around, you could tell the moods. Kenny was still baffled, Stan was half-asleep but watching the film nonetheless, Kyle was a bit skeptical, and Cartman...well, he was mouthing most of the dialogue along with the movie. As Kyle noticed, he stopped mid-sentence, and tried not to look anywhere near him. Apparently he hadn't even intended to do that, and it was undeniably not in his favor that his 'rival' had taken notice. Kyle just looked back at the movie, and that got more baffling than ever. Grumbling to himself, Cartman slid a small piece of paper over to his 'nemesis'. 

'Not gonna comment on anything, Kyle?'

The paper returned, with another message written in sharpie marker. 'What? What's there to comment on?'

'You know damn well what I'm talking about.'

'I seriously don't, dude.' 

'Goddammit, Kyle, stop playing dumb! No wait. You're not playing, are you? ;)'

The next return of the paper was square in the back of Cartman's head. 'Okay, yeah, I saw what you were doing, but wouldn't it have been beter if I didn't? For you, I mean. For me, I was actually ignoring something I could hold over your head, which made it more of a setback than anything. I don't get you at all, dude.'

Cartman mouthed the words 'fuck this' to himself, and scooted over next to Kyle, looking particularly annoyed. "I just, y'know, wanted to confirm that you earned a broken nose." He whispered angrily.

"For what? Looking at the wrong time?" Kyle commented in return, letting out a sigh. "Besides, we both know what'll happen if you get into any physical fight with me. We'll end up rolling on the floor, Kenny will claim that we're having sex, Stan will try to break it up, and it'll end up with us both on opposite sides of the room for the rest of the night. That's happened at the last 4 sleepovers, are you looking to make it a hat trick?"

"...." This caused a brief lull in the conversation. Kyle eventually sighed, picking it back up again. "Why does it matter so much, anyway? A lot of people have seen the movie and a lot have probably memorized the dialogue, so what?"

"It's a love story, Kyle."

"...And?"

"And...I mean...you remember what happened a few months ago." Cartman muttered out. That was when that whole idiotic plan, the one that ended with Cartman declaring his love for Kyle publicly. Kyle had put it under the category of 'never talk about ever again.' But now that rule was being tossed aside. "I'm going to get fuckin' slammed. I'm becoming a **girl** , Kyle. Soon I'll be parading around in dresses and talking about makeup."

"I thought you did that anyway." Kyle smirked. This got a harsh glare from the other boy.

"Just. Don't mention it. Any of my stupidity."

"....As you wish." Kyle leaned back, his head in his arms. Cartman paused for a moment, then mentally searched for a response, as Kenny noticed the ongoing tension, gave an amused look to the two (which only Cartman happened to notice) and put the remote down on the couch arm near them. The blonde winked as he slid back to his seat, and Kyle raised a brow, seeing Cartman's expression.

"Oh. Uh, Kyle. Fetch me that remote up there." 

"...As you wish." He reached for it, and the other boy leaned in, causing them to knock into each other lightly. "Wait, were you really just--" The redhead finally realized what he'd been subconciously implying all that time. Oh. Well then. "I didn't even--ugh. You're an asshole."

"So I've been told."

Kyle rolled his eyes at that response, and the minute that Cartman didn't expect it, he pressed his lips to his, the redhead going red to his ears, and the brunette almost turning pale with shock, and then burning a bright red when he allowed himself to accept that what he had been aiming for was happening.

As for the others? Well, Kenny took one look over, and then immediately assumed a narrating voice, looking decidedly smug. 

"Since the invention of the kiss, there have only been five kisses that were rated the most passionate, the most pure. This one left them all behind."

The pillows thrown at his head were almost worth the expression on the couple of boy's faces.


End file.
